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How and When to Announce Your Engagement

Now that he’s planned all the romantic details of how to propose and has successfully swept you off your feet, your fiancé can breathe a sigh of relief. . . or can he???!? If your parents have never met your future spouse, this can be an extreme source of anxiety. As parents, siblings, and close family are usually the first to hear the news of your engagement, it would be helpful to introduce him into conversations, prompting questions and opportunities to share more about him before bringing him over for a visit. Once you are all familiar, then you can feel reassured of you happy news being received more warmly, instead of it being a complete shock. For brides who have been married before and who have children it is important that your children and ex are informed first.

After sharing the news with your parents and immediate family, most etiquette sources suggest calling relatives and close friends who live further away next. They also suggest calling anyone who might feel slighted by a more informal email, though it is perfectly acceptable to make the announcement using electronic media: email, social networks, and even personalized wedding websites. Traditional newspaper engagement announcements with photos are another option, and you may want to run them in both the place you and your spouse grew up and the place you are currently living 4-6 weeks in advance of the wedding. These types of announcements are great for informing more distant acquaintances and people that may not be invited to the wedding.

Engagement parties are another way to announce your engagement. This is usually done before you announce your engagement formally (on social media or in the newspaper). Engagement parties are traditionally hosted by the bride’s family. The engagement announcement can be a surprise revealed in a toast welcoming the new member of the family, or can be shared by the couple during the party or beforehand. These kinds of parties are usually small and informal cocktail and refreshment events but it is entirely up to the couple’s personal tastes and desires. Since these parties consist of those closest to you, those invited should expect to be invited to the wedding as well.

At VW we are so happy for you both! Warm wishes as you go forth together to celebrate this happy news!

These are some sources I used to write this article:

“Announcing Your Engagement.” Martha Stewart Weddings. Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia, Inc. 2011. Web. 17 June 2013. <>
Lach, Pamela A. The Brides Etiquette Guide: Etiquette Made Easy. Chicago: Chicago Review Press, 1998. Print


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